Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Randomize
