Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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