Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore

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(619): View more from California

He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on

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(757): View more from Virginia

it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again

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(862): View more from New Jersey

forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious

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(609): View more from New Jersey

imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.

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(440): View more from Ohio

im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.

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(845): View more from New York

There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!

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(847): View more from Illinois

Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.

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