I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
