Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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