Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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