The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
