writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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