the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
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