Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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