Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
