a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
