I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
