im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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