So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
