I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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