I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
