im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
