a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
