i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
