ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize