Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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