You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
