remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize