Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
