When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Who died my cat blue again?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
