Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
