you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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