found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
