He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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