My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
