I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
