just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I need to calm my uterus...
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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