If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
COCAINE IS GR8
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
