Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
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