why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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