I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
