Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
wat bout pragnant strippers??
lets start a swedish sibling band together
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
