this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
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