Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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