? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
