(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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