I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
