I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize
