i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
