he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
