dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
