based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
