is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
