I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
His nipple licking is glorious
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