i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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